Moving across the country can be a very lonely experience.

Two years ago, I moved from Nevada to Ohio for a writing program called The Company. I didn’t know anybody before I moved here, and there was nobody I could call at 2 A.M. if I had an emergency.

I’d spent the past couple of months praying for solid friendships in Ohio before the move. I was scared, and I knew that God was the only one who could help me. As I prayed, part of me hoped that when I got off the plane, a group of people would be waiting for me with a giant sign that said, “Alli’s new friends.”

Well, I got to Ohio, and after a month or two, I realized that a group of friends wasn’t going to just appear around me. I continued to pray for friends, then began to seek out a new church. I went to a couple of different churches, looking for people my age I could talk with, and found practically nothing.

Those first couple months were so lonely for me. I spent many lunch breaks sitting alone, wondering why God wasn’t answering this prayer. I spent my weekends biding my time for Monday morning when I’d be able to go back to school and be around people again.

Then, around February, I found a new church. It was a little ways away, about a thirty-minute drive. But the people were so warm and inviting. Plus, a handful of girls around my age were in the church. I was so excited to have finally found something. That excitement quickly turned to disappointment when I learned that all the girls had been friends since early childhood. I couldn’t dream of inserting myself into their friend group—why would they accept me when they already had each other?

I pondered this to myself on the drive home when I heard the Lord whisper something.

“Say Yes.”

In an instant, an idea blossomed in my brain.

If I wanted a community, I needed to put in the time and effort to get to know them. 

I knew what God wanted me to do. He wanted me to say “yes” to whatever I was invited into.  If someone asked to get lunch—Yes! If someone said, “Hey, we’re moving and need help, would you—” Yes! If I went over to someone’s house to pick something up and they offered me a cup of coffee—Yes.

No matter how awkward. No matter how much I felt like I was intruding. No matter if I would really rather stay home and watch movies. I kept it a secret, too. (Who knew what people would invite me to do if they knew I had to say yes to everything?)

God was also clear that it should only be for the next three months. If I said yes to everything for the rest of my life, I would become exhausted.

So, for the next three months, I was obedient. God, in all his goodness, gave me the energy to say “Yes” to these things too. From March to June, I said yes…and I was blessed with a wonderful community!

The people at my church surround me in love. They let me cry on their shoulders when I’m having a bad day. When I have something to celebrate (like when I released my anthology, Lawless), they show up and cheer me on. And, the best part is that I get to be a shoulder for them to cry on, too. I get to celebrate them, too.

They’re not perfect—they were never meant to be perfect. They have their struggles, and I still have mine. But now I’m not fighting these struggles alone, and neither are they.

They have taught me so much about community and vulnerability. They’ve taught me things about Jesus’s love I thought I’d never understand.

God wants you to be in a community. Just reading The Bible makes that abundantly clear. The question you have to ask yourself is, are you willing to say yes?

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Alli and I didn’t know each other when all this happened (or I very much would’ve met her at the airport with a sign saying “Alli’s friend”), but I’m grateful to call her my friend now. She’s releasing an AMAZING book next month, so find out more about it and sign up for updates on her website!